Pissed

speeding ticket… :sad: i am so mad at myself and have been ever since it happened. i finally got the balls to tell my dad and the tears started flowing. it’s when stupid things like this happen that i couldn’t possibly hate myself more. if i lose my license, i’m going to lose whatever life i have. my anxiety has worsened beyond anything i expected and that’s one thing that’s going to take a bit longer to overcome. i need to work more. i need to start running again. i need to learn to relax. i relaxed this weekend… why can’t i relax here? i want school to be over. i want to say that i want a real job that absolutely requires me and forces me to go above and beyond. i have no motivation today and of course, my face went apeshit this afternoon from stressing out. that was the icing on the cake.

more creepy stories to come when i’m in a better mood. today’s incident was quite a gem.