first things first! we’re having a baby girl. we found out last week that there is, for sure, a little girl in there.
after about a day of thinking on it, we decided we’re naming her Caylin Corinne. Caylin because we think it’s pretty. Corinne after my cousin Corey.
after we found out it was a girl (and let it soak in a bit), i pretty much decided that this kid’s whole life (or at least the first part where it just lays there and can’t decide what its surroundings look like) is going to be decked out in rainbows, sparkles, and unicorns. i am in love with this nursery, so this weekend i went to home depot and bought dark gray paint. brett and i finished painting on sunday. this weekend has been reserved for touching up the areas we kind of uh, slipped up on. like all over the ceiling.
now to buy all the rainbows.
in other news, the amazing stacey lynn gave us our wedding photos. here are a few i snagged out of my facebook album.
aaand someday i will remember to post a few pictures of our honeymoon.
life feels like a whirlwind the past few months. since we’re having the baby, i traded my truck in for a 2011 jeep liberty. it was one of maybe 3 SUVs that i liked, and because loki is huge, brett is 6′forever, and now we’ll have a baby seat, an SUV was really my only option. but i really like the jeep. i’m getting used to it. and loki will get used to the trunk.
she had her first ride in the jeep yesterday. this week gave me a bit of a scare when the area where her tumor was removed started swelling again. because it’s a weird kind of cancer, it can change size and shape daily, so when it started swelling, it made me think it might be coming back again. so back to the vet we went. they couldn’t find anything, but the next time i feel anything i have to take her in immediately. i think i waited too long this time because the swelling had gone down again, so they couldn’t get a good sample. i want to keep telling myself she’s ok, because i can’t afford to dish out that kind of money on 8 more rounds of chemo. it’s just not possible.
and we decided to wait another year to buy a house. that way we have a year and a half to save up some more money. i still have to finish paying off loki’s chemotherapy (this is why i can’t afford it, i’m *still* paying for it) and my dental work, and i’d like to be debt free (minus the jeep) when we finally make that kind of a down payment. and ideally before the baby comes. so in a way, it was a huge load off my mind. one less thing to think about this year. not to mention we won’t be switching houses while toting around a newborn. i can’t imagine. more money going out, less money in our pockets, and the added stress of a brand new baby and a brand new lifestyle. i just don’t see a lot of good coming out of that.
my depression has been making the rounds the last month or 2, and i can feel it taking a toll on me. i knew it would happen, but wasn’t sure when. and apparently, the bigger the bump, the more the tears. and it’s only brought on stress. i’ve tried to not unload it all on brett. there have been nights when i’ve had to go upstairs and get it all out, pull myself back together, and curl up with loki on the couch for a few hours. but sometimes the only thing that can make you feel better is a pair of giant man arms around you. he has been nothing short of amazing through all of it. and he knows that a reese’s blast from sonic will cure damn near any bad mood.
which, actually, is another good reason we’re not moving yet. we’ll have a sonic across the street for another whole year.