i got back from baltimore late last night. this week flew by quicker than i ever thought it would. i had heard from a handful of people how bad it was going to be (the training i attended) and to my surprise, they were SO WRONG!

i don’t know if i’m just a dork or if it had something to do with the coffee (i will get to that bit momentarily) or if it was really as fun as i thought it was… but i had SO MUCH FUN during training. it certainly had the potential to quickly turn into death by powerpoint. and it didn’t. it really didn’t. i mean, we were in training from 8:30-3ish every day. the room was set up in a horseshoe, projector in the center. 4-6ish people were conducting the training, and they all had a sense of humor and understood the vitality of bathroom breaks during sessions like this. we had 10-15 minute breaks every hour. spectacular.

i can’t tell the internets what the training was for, but i can say that i think a lot of people were bored out of their minds. i am basing this decision on the fact that there were a few people with their heads propped up against the walls, mouths open, eyes closed, out cold.

i love talking about technology and security and absorbing every bit of it that i can. and the fact that my job combines that with the military absolutely fascinates me. it’s always something new and exciting. and the last 3 days were nothing but that. sure, there was some dry material in there at times, but that’s to be expected. they also threw in a lot of xkcd and lolcats in the powerpoints, and they were all relevant, so kudos to the geeks who put that together. i love you.

i am certain this field is where i belong. it just fits. i learned a lot. i also learned about coffee.

until tuesday morning, these lips had never touched coffee. i had a mocha, once. it was about 1/2 whipped cream (i don’t like whipped cream. i know. i’m weird.) and it was not that good and it made my stomach hurt. i got lost on the way to the training tuesday morning so my original plan to stop at a gas station and buy bookoos of 5-hour energy failed miserably, leaving me with no other choice. i had to drink coffee.

after the first hour of training, i looked at elizabeth and told her i needed help making coffee. you don’t know how to make coffee? no, crazy woman! i have never had it. please assist me in my caffeinated adventure. she informed me that you’re supposed to put creamer and sugar in it. i did that. i put like a half a cup of sugar in my coffee. i also put a boatload of creamer in it. and then i found the hot chocolate powder mix and it was over after that. i dumped half the bag into my cup.

my coffee looked like chocolate milk. and it tasted pretty close (minus the scalding hot part) except i am convinced that you can never fully get rid of the coffee flavor. i suppose i will have to get used to this. on day 1, i had 2 cups and i couldn’t force my face OUT of a smile for the remainder of training. everything was amusing. i kept giggling. i think the most amusing part was the frequent heart flutters and the fact that after the first cup and a half, my hands wouldn’t hold still enough to actually bring the cup to my lips. i also had to go to the little girls’ room about 7 times that day.

on day 2, i upgraded myself to 3 cups. and also on day 3. i have decided i will no longer live without coffee in my life and i will finally use the coffee maker in my kitchen cabinet. i’m not entirely sure why i have one, but somehow i acquired it during college and it stuck with me during the move.

IF YOU BUILD IT, HE [coffee] WILL COME.